


Kidnapped!

by FluentInFangirl12



Category: Animaniacs
Genre: Comedy, Humor, Kidnapping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-11
Updated: 2021-02-10
Packaged: 2021-03-17 06:49:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29346153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FluentInFangirl12/pseuds/FluentInFangirl12
Summary: Scratchansniff gets a phone call he wasn't expecting, but he's not worried about it.Based on a post by @tots-insane-ee on tumblr
Comments: 6
Kudos: 39





	1. Chapter 1

Dr. Scratchansniff looked up from his desk as the phone rang beside him. Odd, he thought to himself, people rarely call the office nowadays. Most appointments are set up by email or in-person. He set aside the paperwork he had been filling out in favor of answering the crying device, picking up the receiver and placing it to his ear. “Dr. Otto von Scratchansniff, how may I help you?”

The other end was silent for a moment. Then a man’s voice gruffly barked out, “We have your kids.” 

This confused the doctor immensely. He was pretty sure he would remember having a child, or even a wife for that matter. “Kidses? Vat are you talking about?”

“The three siblings. Warners. If you don’t comply with our demands, you’ll never see them again,” the voice growled out, frustrated. 

Scratchansniff did a double-take. The Warners were kidnapped? How? How had this guy managed to actually capture them and feel confident enough to make demands? And more importantly, once they inevitably broke free of whatever was holding them, would the kidnapper be okay? “Oh.” 

“...Oh? What’s that supposed to mean?” 

He shook his head and grinned. The p-schyatrist had to stop himself from laughing. “Sir, it appears zere has been un mistake. The Warners are not my kidses, ze are mien patients. I wish you the best of luck with them. If you need tips in how to deal with zem, I have known zem for a long time. Remember: you do not have zem, zey have you. Good day! Remind zem we have an appointment zis afternoon!” Otto kept the phone on just long enough to hear the other man begin to ask “What do you-” before a young voice spoke in the background. He’d recognize that voice anywhere. 

“Wow, were we really good enough to capture to try for a ransom? Man, you really gotta find some new hobbies. Sorry to disappoint but we’ve gotten really good at escaping all kinds of traps before, a few ropes is absolutely nothing. You couldn’t even get nice new ropes and stuck us with the dirty ones! You have to treat your kidnapped kids better than that! Awful service you have here. Well, sibs, you heard Scratchy, it’s time to play before our appointment!” A scream came through the receiver as he hung up. 

Scratchy shook his head as he went back to his paperwork. Those poor souls, they had no idea what they’d gotten themselves into. Any kids on the planet and they picked the Warners to kidnap. Those nappers would never get to see their families again. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happened to the kidnappers?

Yakko couldn't count the number of times he and his siblings had been captured over the years. Mainly by Ralph, but a handful of other people too. It was kind of their thing; they'd escape and wreak havoc until they were caught, get thrown in the tower, escape, and the cycle continued. 

This time seemed a little different, though. The Warners had been inside their tower still. Nobody goes up to the tower unless they actually need something from the trio, which rarely happens. Yakko had been the last to wake up, Wakko had already gotten started on his third breakfast, and Dot was watching some program on TV. They made some light banter with each other. It was an easy morning. When a knock had come to the door, nobody thought too much of it. A little odd, sure, but nothing too serious. Probably just some new person on the lot or someone else who thought they could take on the children.

"I'll get it!" called Wakko as he ran to the door excitedly. The hatted child yanked open the large door, tongue lolling out his mouth in his usual style. "How can I he-" Yakko heard a thump, a cry, and struggling. He and Dot looked at each other and made a beeline for the open door, wondering if they needed to get their mallets and anvils ready. 

Four men stood in the doorway. All wore black and ski masks. The one closest to the door held a burlap sack that was moving. "Hey! That was awfully rude of you! When I get out of here, I'm gonna make you hurt!" came Wakko's muffled voice from inside. 

Yakko sized them up and quipped, "Well, at least you have masks on. Say, I know the virus going around is pretty serious and all but we social distance so theres no need to cover us up like that. You know it's rude to throw your host in a bag? Someone should really-" Darkness covered his vision and the bag around him zipped up tight. "Well, alright then I see how it is. Can we at least get the pleasure of knowing who is kidnapping us?" 

Silence came from outside his cloth prison. Yakko could hear his sister shout something as she was bagged too. Then they started moving. Down the ladder, across the lot, thrown into some kind of vehicle that was turned on and started to move. Judging by the fact that neither of his siblings were saying anything or even trying to escape, they were thinking the same thing he was. 

They'd found their next Special Friends!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After reaching their destination, the Warners had been unceremoniously dumped from their bags and immediately hogtied to a chair. Funnily enough, the nappers did not gag them. The siblings looked at each other and once the men looked away for a moment, they grinned slyly at each other, eyes narrowed. The ropes were pitifully thin, dirty and ragged. Easy to break with over-the-top cartoon powers. Wakko had his bag on him as always and Dot and Yakko had their mallets, anvils, and attitudes. Looking around, they were in an empty warehouse. Only three of the men were there, the fourth must have gone off to do something. The siblings were in the middle of the warehouse and the men were in a group in front of the door, watching them and talking amongst each other.

"Hey now, what's the big idea? Keeping a cute little thing like me in these dirty ropes? I demand better, more high-quality rope!" Dot demanded. The nappers looked at each other, dumbfounded. One walked forward a bit to speak to them. "Yeah, look at this junk. It's so easy to break through," Yakko chimed in, "right, Wakko?" 

Wakko nodded, smiling with his tongue out as he easily slipped out of the bonds. "Very slippery, too." The other siblings followed suit, easily stepping out of the useless rope and standing in a row. Wakko then ate the rope, slurping it up like a long noodle. Yakko leaned across the 8-foot space separating him and the closest kidnapper, getting his face into the man's and jabbing his finger against his chest, "You should be ashamed of yourself. You call yourselves kidnappers? I bet you I could nap a kid better than that with one hand behind my back!" For emphasis, he pulled a small child and a bed out of nowhere, tucking the blonde girl in with his left hand kept firmly to his back and kissing her on the forehead. 

While he was fooling around, the men had come up and grabbed the siblings by their ears and hoisted them off the ground before frantically tying them back to the chair with a thicker, cleaner rope. "Well, now, that's more like it! But seriously, did you never learn how to tie a knot? That is the easiest knot to undo, especially with rope this thick." Yakko stepped out of the rope and grabbed it in his gloves. "Here, let us show you how to tie a knot properly." Before the baddies could react, the trio of Warners wrangled the men into a triad and tied them together with an obnoxious amount of knots and loops. 

They struggled in their bonds and glared at the kids. "Aw, is it too tight for you all in there? Here, let me help with that!" Dot said in her cutest, sing-song voice. She grabbed one of the knots and pulled, sending the three baddies spinning like a top throughout the room. They finally stopped after a few seconds, collapsing into a heap on the floor with their eyes out of focus, stars flying in a halo around their heads. The rope was folded neatly in Dot's hands. "There, now isn't that a little better?" When the vision of the three cleared, their heads turned bright red and steam practically poured out of their ears. All three stood and rushed the Warner siblings, who calmly stood in place. 

Just as the siblings were about to be grabbed, Wakko suddenly produced a mallet triple the size of him and smashed the nappers into the ground. Putting the mallet away safely, he and the other siblings peered down at the men. They all had broken teeth and their eyes were out of focus once again. 

It didn't take long for the chase to begin. This was the part they were used to, running and yelling quips at their pursuers. They led the nappers in a wild chase around the warehouse, going in and out of doors around the walls and even defying gravity. Once they led them up the wall and onto the ceiling, where the kidnappers did a double-take and plummeted to the floor below. The Warners simply shrugged and walked back down. 

The three were out cold by now, so they went wandering around looking for the fourth one. It didn't take long to find him. 

"...Oh? And what's that supposed to mean?" the man asked into the cellphone held to his ear. 

Yakko glanced at Wakko and Dot as they heard the voice of Scratchansniff come through the receiver. They listened in on the very one-sided conversation as they got into position, Wakko and Dot pulling out their mallets and Yakko getting into the front and holding his hands apart like a magician calling for attention. 

_Remind zem we have an appointment zis afternoon!_ Scratchansniff said, obviously ending the conversation. The man began to ask a question but Yakko drowned him out. "Wow, were we really good enough to capture to try for a ransom? Man, you really gotta find some new hobbies. Sorry to disappoint but we’ve gotten really good at escaping all kinds of traps before, a few ropes is absolutely nothing. You couldn’t even get nice new ropes and stuck us with the dirty ones! You have to treat your kidnapped kids better than that! Awful service you have here. Well, sibs, you heard Scratchy, it’s time to play before our appointment!" 

Once the man turned around, his eyes turned round as saucers as he took in their mallets and grins, complete with pointed teeth. He screamed as he got pummeled with one mallet, then another, then another. The siblings ended up beating him to the tune of their theme song with their mallets, ending their impromptu performance with a well-timed anvil. The man sat up from under the anvil, teeth falling out, bruised, arm broken, and eyes out of focus. 

The siblings ended up tying up the kidnappers and taking them back to the studio with them. They told Ralph about what had happened so he could take care of them as they merrily skipped off to their appointment to annoy Scratchy. They were right on time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wanted to keep them closer to the original 1993 versions of them vs the 2020 versions but hey, both were good in their own ways

**Author's Note:**

> Should I make a pt 2 featuring what the sibs did to the nappers?


End file.
